It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want to, Cry If I want to...,.

NOT!!!!!!!

Well I am officially 1 year away from 50 yrs young.

I am officially off the sick list (and off the couch) and ready to embrace that big number coming up...

Who cares about 49 right? Well this year I do...

10 years ago today I woke up and said OMG!!! I'm turning 40 in a year...

so the whole year all I did was stress and obsess about the big 40.. and did not enjoy my 39th year....At the time I was working in a OBGYN's office and I asked patients what they did, or how they felt when they turned 40.. (I did this everyday I worked) some of the women sure did surprise me with there answers.. most were OK but some wanted to completely leave everything behind (kids and husband included) and have a different life....most just had parties or went on a trip or something fun..

So when I woke up on my 40th birthday I felt the same as 39... I kinda got mad a myself for making such a big deal about it... I did not accomplish anything and I didn't even do what I wanted  because I never planned it.. I was too worried about the next year....

This year will be different!!! I am not going to think about turning 50 all the time (just some of the time).... I have a whole Lotta thing to do and things that I want to do and believe me I am going to do what I want on my 50th...... I'm going to plan it this time.........

So happy birthday to me....

and

OMG I'M TURNING 50 IN A YEAR...........